Taimiyyah Zubair – Prophetic Patience – Grounded Online
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Inshallah for today's session.
I'm honored to welcome you all and to
spend the next hour inshallah benefiting along with
you all for today's session.
This is part of a webinar series titled
Muslim mental health matters, that is sponsored by
our amazing phenomenal new course that has launched
titled grounded find emotional strength for yourself and
your loved ones.
This, this course is taught by stress our
Sultan who's one of my favorite kind of
person personalities in this space and have been
a lot and it's a follow up to,
if those are of you who are OG
may remember to an experience that we hosted
about three, four years ago, three years ago
I think in COVID titled inside out, outside
in, which was our kind of introduction to
the mental health space and incorporating, you know,
Islamic guidance when it comes to some of
the most painful and the most difficult things
that Muslims are struggling with in their personal
lives and especially in their mental health.
So I'm gonna we're very excited to bring
this experience to you all.
And, of course, I'd have that to make
this something that's accessible to everyone.
This is a pay what you can experience
which means that you are able to inshallah
register, no matter where you're coming in from,
whatever your capacity whatever your ability is.
You're able to register with however much you
would like to support the experience through.
So inshallah we're very excited to bring that
to you inshallah I will be sharing the
link to the course for you guys in
the chat for those of you who are
not yet registered if you are already Mashallah
Mabrook, welcome to the experience and to the
fam and we're very excited for you to
continue to benefit with us inshallah and I've
drive that here in the link in the
chat and I'll share that again throughout the
course of the experience.
With that said, I want to introduce our
first topic for this series, which is lessons
of patience for the life of the Prophet
sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.
And of course, we have no other than
Usada Tamiah Zubair, who is one of our
instructors here at Al-Maghrib Institute.
She's an expert in in Quranic studies in
tafsir and word analysis, she teaches many classes
with us on site and especially recently very
much so online through our virtual seminars through
Faith Essentials, and through guest appearances on other
Al-Maghrib programs such as this, she's got
over a decade of teaching experience and inshallah
today she's going to walk us through this
journey inshallah we'll take some time, hopefully at
the end of the session to ask any
questions to Usada Tamiah, and we look forward
to kicking off with her for today's session.
Jazakumullah khair to those of you who made
time to be with us live here in
the chat please do introduce yourselves I know
I see a lot of names popping up
here Alhamdulillah.
So do let us know where you're coming
in from, and if there's anything that you
benefit from any gems any particular points that
really stand out so others can benefit as
well and feel free to share the khair
for the course for others.
I see that Usada is with us Alhamdulillah
so I don't want to take any more
time I know there's so much to be
benefited from I see some folks Mashallah coming
from Karachi.
Oh, that's my my apologies, Pakistan, I see
Sri Lanka, I see Charlotte, North Carolina.
Welcome, welcome to all of you, and Jazakumullah
khair for being with us and Usada, welcome
to you as well.
Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.
How are you doing today?
Walaikumussalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.
Alhamdulillah I'm well.
How are you doing Hafsa?
Alhamdulillah Usada, I'm honestly very excited.
I think, like, you know, it's inside out,
outside in the original class that Umar launched
on this topic was really groundbreaking and personally
so beneficial for me and we got so
much feedback from just people from all corners
of the globe that were sharing such personal
painful things that they had been struggling with.
I'm so happy that we have a course
as significant as this.
That is now available for everyone.
So, and Jazakumullah khair to your contributions to
this bonus webinar for the experience and for
benefiting everyone here who's with us.
I'm so excited to jump in.
I'll pass it off to you Usada.
Jazakumullah khairan.
Barakallah fiki.
Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh everyone.
A'udhu billahi minash shaitanir rajim.
Bismillah ar-Rahman ar-Raheem.
As-salatu was-salamu ala rasoolihi al-kareem.
Rabb ishraah li sadri, wa yassir li amri,
wahlul uqtatan min lisani, yafqahu qawli.
Allahumma hdi qalbi, wa saddid lisani, waslul sakhimata
qalbi.
Ameen.
Ya Rabb al-alameen.
Allah azza wa jal tells us in the
Quran that laqad kana lakum fi rasoolillahi uswatun
hasana.
That there is certainly for you in the
messenger of Allah an excellent example.
Meaning the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam is
an excellent example for you to follow.
But this is for who?
This is for liman kana yarjullaha wal yawm
al-akhir.
This is for the person who wants Allah,
who wants the approval of Allah, the pleasure
of Allah, who ultimately wants that Allah subhanahu
wa ta'ala is pleased with him or
her.
And wal yawm al-akhir.
This person is also aiming for the last
day, for the hereafter, meaning they want to
succeed in the hereafter.
So for this person, the Prophet salallahu alayhi
wa sallam is an excellent example.
And we try to follow the Prophet salallahu
alayhi wa sallam, of course, in our prayers,
in our du'as, in the way that
we worship Allah.
But a major part of worship is how
we connect with Allah, how we think with
Allah, what kind of thoughts we have about
Allah, and how we reach out to him
in times of difficulty and how we seek
help from Allah azza wa jal.
And we see that the Prophet salallahu alayhi
wa sallam showed that to us.
He taught that to us throughout his life.
Because out of all the people, who is
it that is tested the most?
It is, of course, the Prophets of Allah,
right?
They are tested the most in so many
different ways.
And the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam, the
tests and trials that he experienced in his
life are, of course, well known, right?
We all know that he was born an
orphan.
He was raised in poverty.
He did not have a consistent guardian in
his life until he was with his uncle
Abu Talib.
And even there, he had to work from
a very young age.
I mean, these are things that are well
known, right?
The hardships that the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa
sallam experienced in his life.
And then we also know that after receiving
Prophethood, again, the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam
continued to be tested, but in different ways
now, not just in personal matters.
Because, of course, we know that after Prophethood,
he lost his children.
In fact, all of his children died in
his lifetime, except for one daughter, Fatima radiyallahu
anha.
And after Prophethood, you see that the kind
of trials that the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa
sallam experienced were, of course, in the way
of Allah.
What he suffered at the hands of people,
the pain that he felt at the hands
of those who disbelieved in him, and those
who lied about him, those who opposed him,
those who tried to, you know, harm him
and hurt him.
And create hurdles for him in every step
that he took, basically.
And Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala addresses the
Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam in the Quran.
And Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says that,
basically, you are grieving too much, which shows
us that the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam
would be extremely sad.
He would feel a lot of pain inside
of his heart.
He would grieve very deeply because of how
the people were responding to him and how
the people were opposing him.
In Surah Al-Kahf, Allah subhanahu wa ta
'ala says that perhaps you would kill yourself.
Meaning the way you are grieving, the way
that you are sad, the way that you
are upset, this amount of grief could actually
kill you.
It would destroy you.
You would perhaps kill yourself, meaning because of
your grieving, and your grieving would kill you.
Why is it that the Prophet salallahu alayhi
wa sallam would be upset?
What is the reason for his sadness?
It wasn't that he didn't have enough to
eat.
It wasn't that he didn't have the things
that the people of the world desire to
have.
No.
His grief was in the way of Allah.
It was because of the disbelief of people.
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says, إِلَّمْ يُؤْمِنُوا
بِهَٰذَا الْحَدِيثِ أَسَفَةًۭ Because these people don't believe.
In Surah Al-Shu'ara also, Allah subhanahu
wa ta'ala says, لَعَلَّكَ بَاخِعُ النَّفْسَكَ أَلَّا
يَكُونُ مُؤْمِنِينَ That perhaps you would kill yourself
because these people don't believe.
So over and over again, we see that
in the Quran, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
tells his Messenger salallahu alayhi wa sallam that
you're grieving too much.
And this shows us that the Prophet salallahu
alayhi wa sallam felt a lot of pain
inside of his heart because of the disbelief
of people and because of their opposition.
So then what is it that Allah subhanahu
wa ta'ala told him to do?
How did Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala console
his Messenger salallahu alayhi wa sallam?
What is it that Allah subhanahu wa ta
'ala taught his Messenger to do in order
to manage this grief, in order to manage
all of these feelings?
Because, you know, the ulama say that huzn,
sadness, is of two kinds.
One type of sadness is that which is
for the dunya.
And the other type of sadness is that
which is for the akhira.
Other ulama say that one type of sadness
is that which is of benefit to you.
And the other type of sadness is that
which is harmful for you.
So sadness and grief, these are emotions that
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala has created inside
of us.
And they're necessary.
They play an important role.
But they cannot be left uncontrolled.
And they cannot be left to lead our
reactions and our actions and drive our decisions.
Because when they're left out of control, they
can actually be very, very detrimental.
And this is the reason why Allah subhanahu
wa ta'ala tells his Messenger salallahu alayhi
wa sallam in the Quran, for example, that
la tahzan, do not be sad.
La tahzan alayhim, do not be sad over
them or because of them.
This is not an invalidation of sadness.
No, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala validates the
feelings of sadness that the Prophet salallahu alayhi
wa sallam experienced.
But at the same time, Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala taught him how to manage those
feelings.
So I want to spend the next little
while that we have together discussing some verses
in the Quran in which Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala teaches his Messenger salallahu alayhi wa
sallam as to how he should observe patience
and how he should manage and control the
sadness so that it does not become destructive.
It becomes a tool and it becomes beneficial,
but it does not get out of control
so that it becomes destructive.
And of course, these verses are a huge
lesson for us as well, because if Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala is teaching his Messenger
salallahu alayhi wa sallam to do these things,
imagine how beneficial they could be for us
as well.
So the first ayah that I want to
talk about is in Surah Al-An'am,
in verse number 33, Allah subhanahu wa ta
'ala says, قَدْ نَعْلَمُوا إِنَّهُ لَيَحْزُنُكَ الَّذِي يَقُولُونَ
That indeed, in fact, we know, Allah knows
that what the people say hurts you.
Allah knows that what these people say about
you hurts you.
And what is it that the people would
say about him and to him and against
him on his face and also behind his
back lies about the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa
sallam, right?
They would call him a magician.
They would call him a liar.
They would call him a madman.
That you are insane, or that he was
a sorcerer, a soothsayer, and things like that.
Or that he had some ulterior motive for
spreading this message that he was seeking personal
glory or something like that.
And if any such things are said about
any individual, all right, this would certainly hurt.
And sometimes the cause of our pain and
sadness is simply the kind of things that
people say, right?
About how you're not a good mother, right?
You are not a good daughter, or that
you are not a good friend.
And people don't say these things directly.
Sometimes they say these things indirectly.
And these things are very, very hurtful.
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, first and foremost,
we see that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
tells his messenger that we know what you
are going through.
Because Allah, our Rabb, the one who created
us, is al khalaq al alim.
He created us and he also knows us.
He knows what is happening to us.
And he also knows how we're feeling.
He knows exactly what we're feeling.
In Surah Al-Hijr, also Allah says, وَلَقَدْ
نَعْلَمُ أَنَّكَ يَضِيقُ صَدْرُكَ بِمَا يَقُولُونَ We know
that your chest feels constricted, like you feel
so tight and suffocated inside because of what
these people say.
So Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala tells his
messenger that we know and we should also
know that our Rabb knows what is happening
to us.
And Allah knows how we're feeling.
The second thing, the second ayah that I
want to talk about is in Surah Al
-Tur, where Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says
to his messenger, وَاصْبِرْ لِحُكْمِ رَبِّكَ فَإِنَّكَ بِأَرْيُونِنَا
That be patient for the command of your
Lord because indeed you are under our eyes.
We're watching you.
And this verse is showing us that Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala is watching you.
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala loves you.
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala cares about you.
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala is with you.
He's guarding you.
He is protecting you.
So you don't need to feel afraid.
You don't need to feel alone.
You are under Allah's watch.
فَإِنَّكَ بِأَرْيُونِنَا You know, people, for example, if
we are under watch, it could be for
different reasons.
We could be under watch, under observation, right?
Because somebody is just waiting to ounce at
us and criticize us and attack us, right?
Waiting for us to make the first mistake
so that they can cancel us.
And other times, people are watching or we
are being watched.
Why?
From a place of love and care and
protection.
Right?
So, for example, your child or your student
wants to do something which they're struggling with.
And you say, it's okay.
Go ahead.
I'm here.
It's okay.
Try.
I'm here.
If you need me, I'm here.
Allah tells his Messenger ﷺ فَإِنَّكَ بِأَرْيُونِنَا You
are under our eyes.
We are watching you.
You're not alone.
These people cannot harm you.
So, this is another important thing to remember,
that while we are going through whatever test,
whatever trial, whatever difficulty in our lives, we
have to remember that Allah is watching us.
We are not abandoned and left on our
own, even when it comes to the greatest
atrocities that are happening in the world.
Allah ﷻ is watching.
Allah is a witness.
Allah knows.
Another thing we see in this ayah is
that Allah tells his Messenger ﷺ that وَاصْبِرْ
لِحُكْمِ رَبِّك That be patient over the decree
of your Lord.
And this has been interpreted in a number
of ways.
One interpretation is that it means, O Prophet
ﷺ, be patient over the decree of your
Lord.
Meaning what Allah has decreed for you.
And what this teaches us is that whatever
is happening in your life that is causing
you pain, that is causing you big feelings,
that is causing big feelings inside of you
to bother you, to affect you, to cause
you distress.
Well, whatever is happening is happening by the
decree of Allah.
Right?
So for example, in the case of the
Prophet ﷺ, if the people did not believe,
if the people were opposing the Prophet ﷺ,
if they were fighting him, they were killing
the Muslims, whatever that was happening, well, all
of that was decreed.
Allah ﷻ had already decreed for you.
Do we not believe that everything is by
divine decree?
It is one of the six pillars of
Iman.
Iman bil qadr.
Which means that nothing happens in this existence
except that it was decreed by Allah.
So anything that we suffer, whether it is
that a family member is a cause of
constant distress for you, or somebody at work
is a source of annoyance for you, could
be a person, could be a certain situation
in your life, could be the events that
are happening in the world, whatever is causing
us to feel what we're feeling, remember, this
was already decreed.
And our job as the slaves of Allah
is to be patient over the decree of
Allah.
And of course, being patient does not mean
that you just surrender and you don't do
anything.
No.
It means that you accept that this is
not an accident.
This is Allah's decree.
This was part of the plan.
And if Allah has decreed this for us,
it's not against us.
It may seem like it is against us,
but it is not against us.
It's going to lead to something that is
going to be good for us.
So, wasbir li hukmi rabbik, be patient over
the decree of your Lord.
Has Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala not promised
us that He is going to test us?
He has.
So, be patient over the decree of your
Lord.
And remember that whatever happens in the world,
any loss, any pain, any type of hunger
or fear, the different types of trials that
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala has told us
about, these were decreed even before the heavens
and the earth were created.
So, be patient over the decree of your
Lord.
Another interpretation is that be patient over the
command of your Lord, meaning the command that
Allah has given you, which is that you
have to convey the message.
It's not easy.
People are not believing.
People are opposing you.
They're spreading lies and rumors about you.
Well, what are you going to do?
Are you going to quit?
You cannot quit.
You have to keep going.
You have to keep doing your part.
And this is what patience means, that be
patient over the command of your Lord.
And another interpretation is that be patient for
the command of your Lord to come, meaning
until Allah creates ease for you and grants
you victory.
Hold on until that time.
So, وَصْبِرْ لِحُكْمِ رَبِّكَ فَإِنَّكَ بِأَرْيُونِنَا You are
under our eyes.
We are watching you.
So, you cannot quit.
You have to accept the decree of Allah
and you have to keep going.
You have to keep striving until the command
of your Lord comes.
And the third verse that I want to
talk about is in Surah Al-Rum.
In Surah Al-Rum, Allah Subh'anaHu Wa
Ta-A'la says, فَصْبِرْ إِنَّ وَعْدَ اللَّهِ
حَقُّ Be patient.
Indeed, the promise of Allah is true.
And this statement, actually Allah Subh'anaHu Wa
Ta-A'la mentions it in many places
in the Quran, in Surah Al-Ghafir as
well, that فَصْبِرْ إِنَّ وَعْدَ اللَّهِ حَقُّ And
this ayah is teaching us that be patient
because you believe that Allah's promise is true.
Because sometimes when a trial goes on for
too long, what seems like too long, right?
And what seems to become unbearable, right?
It's easy to begin to lose hope and
to begin to despair and to begin to
slow down in your effort because you think
that, oh, I'm trying all this but it's
not really making a difference.
What does Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A
'la say to His Messenger ﷺ?
That be patient, the promise of Allah is
true and have no doubt about this.
And what is the promise of Allah?
That إِنَّ الْعَقِبَةَ لِلْمُتَّقِينَ That the good outcome
is for those who are righteous.
Those who commit oppression, those who do wrong,
they will never succeed, never ever.
Allah's promise is for who?
Those who fear Allah.
And when you look at the life of
the Prophet ﷺ, imagine him in Mecca, right?
Imagine how the family of Ammar, right?
They're being persecuted and then they're being killed.
And Abu Bakr radiAllahu anhu, who was so
honorable in Mecca and now what is happening?
He's not allowed to live in Mecca because
people are not allowing him to recite the
Quran in his house.
SubhanAllah.
And he is leaving Mecca.
This is Abu Bakr, right?
And you know about the stories of the
companions, how they were all struggling to a
point that Khabbab radiAllahu anhu one day came
to the Prophet ﷺ and asked him that
when will the help of Allah come?
When will it come?
Are we not upon the truth, right?
The companions began to ask.
So the Prophet ﷺ, what is it that
he was told by Allah?
Do not despair.
Do not quit.
Do not give up hope.
Believe that Allah's promise is true.
And in one place in the Quran, Allah
says after the statement, that those who are
not certain should not discourage you.
Meaning the people who don't believe in Allah,
the people who don't believe in you, the
people who don't believe in the Hereafter, don't
let their actions discourage you.
Because they want you to get discouraged.
They want you to quit.
They want you to give up.
So don't come under their pressure.
Be strong, be resilient and keep going.
And the Prophet ﷺ, he was also told
in the Quran, that whether we show you
some of what we have promised them, meaning
whether we punish them in your lifetime, or
we cause you to die and the punishment
comes on them afterwards, then in either case,
these enemies of yours are returning to us.
Meaning they're returning to Allah, and Allah will
give them exactly what they deserve.
So sometimes what happens is that we obsess
too much over what should happen to those
who are doing wrong.
Sometimes all of our focus is on them.
And I'm not just talking about in bigger
scenarios, but sometimes in our personal lives as
well.
For example, if there's a particular individual who
does not understand the problems that they're creating
in your life, and how the wrong things
that they do are very upsetting.
Sometimes we focus entirely on them, that I
have to somehow tell them.
I have to somehow make them realize.
I have to somehow get back at them.
I can't be a pushover over here.
I can't be treated like this.
But the thing is, you can't waste your
time obsessing over them, because it's possible that
they don't get it.
And how often it happens that people do
not understand the wrong that they're doing, or
sometimes they understand, they realize, but they actually
want to do that wrong.
They don't care about you, they care about
themselves.
So don't become impatient to see that perfect
justice is established in this world.
That's not, it's not necessary that it's going
to happen in your lifetime.
It may happen in your lifetime, it may
not happen, right?
But ultimately, everyone is returning to Allah.
So remember that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
does not neglect, and Allah subhanahu wa ta
'ala does not forget.
All right.
It is said that Allah subhanahu wa ta
'ala yumhil, he gives respite, he gives time
to those who do wrong.
All right.
But he does not yuhmil, he does not
forget.
Just because Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala is
giving time to someone, it doesn't mean that
he has forgotten about them.
No.
So leave your matters to Allah, just like
the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam did.
Now, what is it that Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala told the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa
sallam to do?
Right.
First, we see that Allah subhanahu wa ta
'ala tells him that, know that Allah subhanahu
wa ta'ala is aware of what you
are feeling and what is happening.
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala is watching over
you.
Right.
فَإِنَّكَ بِأَرْيُونِنَا And that you must believe in
the promises of Allah.
Do not lose hope.
So, what are the practical things that the
Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was told to
do?
We see that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
tells his Messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam in
Surah Ghafir, verse number 55, that فَاصْبِرْ إِنَّ
وَعْدَ اللَّهِ حَقْ Be patient.
Indeed, the promise of Allah is true.
Now, do what?
وَاسْتَغْفِرْ لِذَنْبِكَ Seek forgiveness for your sins.
Seek forgiveness from Allah.
And وَسَبِّحْ بِحَمْدِ رَبِّكَ Glorify your Lord when?
In the evening and in the morning.
Okay.
Two things Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala tells
his Messenger to do.
First is seek forgiveness.
Right.
Now, there's a whole discussion about whether the
Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam even committed anything
that could be called a sin.
Right.
So, the ulama say that the reason why
the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is told
to seek forgiveness is because through him we
are actually being taught that we should seek
forgiveness.
Right.
And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam sought
forgiveness from Allah even though he did not
commit sins but he asked Allah for forgiveness
and that goes to show how much more
important it is for us to seek forgiveness.
Now, what happens is that when we're going
through a tough time obviously, we question ourselves
and we wonder, well, am I being punished?
Am I being punished for something wrong that
I may have done?
Right.
And yes, you should think about that.
You should introspect but don't let shaitan play
with you over there and make you think
that oh, this is a punishment from God
and Allah is very angry with you and
you're doomed.
Right.
No.
If you feel and yes, we should feel
that perhaps this is a consequence of my
own wrongdoing.
And a lot of times it happens that
for example, if a certain individual is treating
you in a harsh way we don't realize
that perhaps we are creating that reality by
our harshness as well.
Right.
That we instigated them Right.
Because you can't expect that someone's behavior is
just happening in a vacuum.
There could be a reason behind that.
I'm not saying that that's always the case
but a lot of times in typical family
situations in typical situations of conflict a lot
of times we also play a role in
bringing about the negative reactions of people.
I'm not saying that's always the case.
All right.
But many times it happens.
So let's say you are at fault.
All right.
Or let's say you are not at fault
but Chaitan is telling you that you are
at fault and that you are a horrible
person and that you deserve this and you
are evil, etc.
Well, even if I am the worst person
ever even if I deserve all of this
well, guess what?
My Lord is forgiving and I ask Allah
for forgiveness.
وَاسْتَغْفِرْ لِذَنْبِكَ Don't let spiritual guilt cause you
to become distant from Allah and prevent you
from seeking Allah's help.
No.
Even if you feel like yeah, I don't
pray properly.
I don't do this.
I don't do that.
And of course, God is going to punish
me.
Even if that's the case well, ask Allah
for forgiveness.
Let istighfar be your way back to Allah.
Right.
So, وَاسْتَغْفِرْ لِذَنْبِكَ Another thing Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala tells His Messenger is وَسَبِّحْ بِحَمْدِ
رَبِّكَ Glorify your Lord.
Praise your Lord.
Glorify and praise Him.
Why?
Because when you glorify Allah when you say
subhanAllah what are you doing?
You are mentioning the perfection of Allah.
That Allah is perfect.
That Allah is free of any fault.
That Allah is free of anything that is
blameworthy.
Anything that could be wrong.
He does not make mistakes.
Right.
He does not have any equal.
He does not do anything wrong.
Allah is perfect.
And when you praise Allah what are you
doing?
You are thanking Allah.
Right.
So, when you glorify and praise Allah this
is not just a way of earning reward.
Right.
Because of course كُلُّ تَسْبِيحَةٍ صَدَقَةٍ But this
is also a way of correcting your thoughts.
Okay.
About Allah and about yourself.
That Allah is perfect.
And yes, I am not.
Allah is perfect.
And He is able to bring good out
of this.
Allah is perfect.
And He did not make a mistake when
He decreed this test for me.
Allah is perfect.
And He is able to do all things.
And He can make the situation better.
Even though it seems so impossible.
He can fix it.
Right.
Because my Lord is perfect.
So, سَبِّحْ بِحَمْدِ رَبِّكَ And praise Allah and
thank Him.
Why?
Because Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala has not
just given you this hardship and these trials
in your life.
He has also blessed you with ease.
Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala has also given
you good things.
So, glorify and praise Allah.
And the ulema say that سَبِّحْ over here
doesn't just mean تَسْبِحْ It also means praise
Allah.
Because تَسْبِحْ is not just verbal glorification.
It also includes salah.
And in your salah, what do you do?
You make sajda.
And when you go into sajda, sajda is
the closest position you are in to Allah
Azza wa Jal.
وَسْجُدْ وَاقْتَرِبْ Make sajda and draw close to
Allah.
So, تَسْبِحْ and حَمْدْ in the morning, in
the evening and also salah, this is something
that actually brings you comfort.
Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala tells His Messenger
in Surah Taha that وَمِنْ آنَاءِ اللَّيْنِ فَسَبِّحْ
وَأَطْرَافَ النَّهَارِ Why?
لَعَلَّكَ تَرْضَى That in the portions of the
night, glorify Allah or praise Allah and also
at the two ends of the day, in
the beginning and at the end.
Why?
So that you may be happy, so that
you may become pleased.
So, the dhikr of Allah and praying to
Allah, salah, this is something that actually brings
us happiness and joy in our lives.
And this is something that actually takes sadness
away.
Because you know that you're not alone.
You know that you have entrusted your affairs
to Allah.
And Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala will take
care of it.
You know that nothing is happening in vain.
You know that Allah is watching.
Everything is being recorded.
And Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala will compensate
in the best way.
So, Hafsa, I'll pause over here for now.
Sounds amazing, inshallah.
Jazakumullahu khair.
Usada, I feel like from the chat here
and on YouTube, I can tell this is
what a lot of folks needed to hear.
And I'm glad it resonates with so many
folks in the audience.
Alhamdulillah.
It feels very personal to some of the
struggles that you're experiencing.
And this is why we created this course.
This is the whole purpose of us facilitating
this gathering.
Because a lot of people suffer in silence.
Or there's just, you know, they think it's
not, you know, I'm just, my day-to
-day life is just hard.
There's struggles.
You know, life is hard in general.
And they don't sometimes get the help that
they need.
And Islamic mental health is something that, alhamdulillah,
is a growing space.
And we wanted to contribute through our own
alhamdulillah expertise of matching our Islamic knowledge and
our access to our wonderful instructors, as well
as the professional knowledge of Sister Sara Sultan
and her background as a licensed mental health
counselor.
So, we're so excited to be able to
bring this to everybody.
I'm going to take some time to give
you guys the opportunity to send any questions
that you have for Usada Taymiah for the
remainder of this session.
If you can, please, private message them to
me here on Zoom.
Because you've RSVP'd here, we'll take the questions
from the audience here.
Just message them so that I don't lose
them.
I have one already that has been submitted.
And while you guys are doing that, just
a quick reminder, of course, about the experience.
And then we'll, inshallah, be right back with
Usada Taymiah to take your questions, inshallah.
So, for those of you who are coming
in a little bit late or who are
coming in just now, alhamdulillah, this is the
first session in our four-part webinar series
on Muslim mental health.
It's, the first session is on the lessons
of patients from the life of the Prophet,
salallahu alayhi wa sallam.
And this session is recorded.
If you missed anything, inshallah, it'll be in
your student portal.
It's briefly on YouTube, but it will likely
not stay on there.
So make sure that you do register.
For however much you can, alhamdulillah, we've made
this experience pay what you can so that
we don't have anybody who is unable to
attend it.
No matter what your financial situation is, you
give as little or as much as you're
able to, inshallah, we know life can be
tough.
And we don't want anyone to feel alone
or unsupported by the community just because they
don't have the resources, inshallah.
And we've made this just as amazing as
all the other Maghreb online courses, a really
professional experience where you get access to a
private member portal.
You get access to lifetime recordings of the
seminar that Ustad Az-Zahra Sultan has spent
years working on, alhamdulillah.
And no matter what your struggle is, everyone
is going through something, whether it's a significant
personal loss, financial or emotional, whatever it is,
it's essential for you as a Muslim, as
a human being, to have well-rounded support
and to have the tools to help to
manage and deal with these difficult experiences.
And alhamdulillah, this course is also focused on
parents who are trying to equip their children
with those tools as well, inshallah, and to
be able to teach that in a balanced
and a safe way, alhamdulillah, for kids who
are just growing up in this environment, whether
it's just them growing up as minorities in
a non-Muslim space or a majority in
a non-Muslim space, whether it's just teaching
them the tools to navigate these conversations and
these experiences that they go through.
There's some questions I see that have come
in already.
The link for Grounded has been dropped a
few times to the amazing folks on the
team here who are doing so.
If you have any further questions, please feel
free to reach out to us online at
almaghrib.org and we can help to assist
you there, but I'm going to try now
that I've got so many questions submitted to
start going through them.
The first question that came in ahead of
time, Jazakumullahu khair for being back with us
as we jump into our Q&A.
The first question was a little bit lengthy,
so I'm condensing it as best as I
can, but the questioner is asking, can you
please explain how to reconcile accepting a loss
while you're still praying for change or help
for the situation?
Because it's something that they're having a challenge
with knowing that it's, you know, you shouldn't
have a lack of faith in Allah.
You should continue to make da'at if
it's something that you still want and you
know Allah has the power to change anything
or anyone, but when there's no change or
the door seems to be closed, then they're
trying to wonder, you know, if it doesn't
look like it's going to be open as
Allah is telling you that this is not
something that's good for you and you should
move on from that experience.
There's a number of things that we can
discuss here.
Okay.
What comes to mind is the story of
Zakariya Alayhis Salaam.
Right.
Zakariya Alayhis Salaam was at an age where
he was so old.
Right.
His body was weak.
His hair was white.
And he said, وَلَمْ أَكُن بِدُعَآئِكَ رَبِّ شَقِيًّا
And he said, my Lord, I have never
been, I have never been unblessed by calling
on you.
Meaning every time that I have called on
you, you have blessed me with something.
Right.
Remember that the purpose of Dua is not
just to get what you want.
Dua is not just a way of getting
something that you wish for.
The purpose Dua is Ibadah.
It is the essence of worship.
It is a way of connecting us to
Allah.
All right.
Because let's say you pray for a job,
you get it.
You pray for money, you get it.
You pray for a spouse, you get it.
You pray for a child, you get it.
You pray for anything of this world, you
get it.
Then what?
Are you going to stay with these things
forever?
Are these things going to stay with you
forever?
No, because مَا عِندَكُمْ يَنفَتْ Whatever is with
you is going to run out.
Right.
It's going to finish.
وَمَا عِندَ اللَّهِ بَاقْ And what is with
Allah is going to last forever.
So when you make Dua for something, all
right, remember that there's two sides to it.
One is your connection with Allah.
All right.
And the other is the thing, the object,
the thing of this world that you wish
for, that you are asking Allah سُبْحَانَهُ وَ
تَعَالَى for.
Your calling upon Allah, your Dua is going
to benefit you eternally.
All right.
And what you get here is probably going
to stay with you for some time.
You might be able to enjoy it.
Maybe not.
Right.
But the ultimate benefit of Dua is what
it is in calling upon Allah سُبْحَانَهُ وَ
تَعَالَى So this is why when you call
upon Allah, you must have hope because what
does hope do?
It keeps you calling on Allah over and
over and over again.
Yesterday, you're praying for one thing.
Today, you're praying for something else.
Tomorrow, you're praying for something else.
Why?
Because Allah, right?
It's a way of connecting with Allah.
It's a way of worshiping Allah.
It is the essence of worship.
Right.
So you don't despair.
All right.
You don't think negative thoughts about Allah.
You don't think that Allah will not hear
me, that Allah will not give me what
I want.
No.
Ibrahim Alayhi Salaam, he kept praying to have
children.
When was he given children?
So late.
And what did he say?
Indeed, my Lord is surely the hearer of
du'as.
Right.
He's thanking Allah that Alhamdulillah, all praise and
thanks to Allah who granted me, in spite
of my old age, two sons, Ismail and
Ishaq.
Zakariya Alayhi Salaam is making du'a and
he's saying, Right.
Right.
So focus on the connection that you are,
that you have, that you are developing, all
right, with Allah Azza wa Jal, through the
du'a.
And you know what?
There will come a point where you will
find so much pleasure and so much comfort
in du'a that that will be far
greater than the comfort that you could get
by having the thing that you were praying
for.
And in the hereafter, what will matter is,
and eternally, right, what will matter is not
the things you got by praying for them.
It is the closeness that you found with
Allah by calling on him.
So that is the ultimate goal.
So keep thinking good about Allah, right, because
Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A'la says,
I am as my servant thinks I am.
Right.
Don't think about Allah, negative thoughts or all
types of weird thoughts about Allah.
No, think good about Allah.
Expect good from Allah and accept the decree
of Allah.
Right.
Whether you get in your life what you
were praying for or not, at the end,
be pleased with what Allah Subh'anaHu Wa
Ta-A'la chooses for you.
Because what he chooses for you is better
than what you choose for yourself.
Beautiful.
Jazakumullahu khair.
That's such an important reframing of the entire
approach to the problem that the person is
experiencing.
May Allah make that a benefit.
And jazakumullahu khair to everyone.
There's so many questions coming in.
We're going to do as much justice as
we can to them.
We do have limited time.
I do want to remind you guys that
mashaAllah we have an 18 plus hour course
that tackles a lot of the experiences that
you are going to be discussing or asking
about here.
And we have bonus Q&A sessions with
Ustadhah Sara Sultan plus other bonus sessions here
in this webinar series.
So bear with us if we don't get
to everyone.
There's some great questions being asked.
The first question that I have next is,
please tell us how you grieve somebody who,
how does someone grieve an abusive father who's
passed away?
Wow.
That's a heavy one.
It is a heavy one.
Look, two things can be true, right?
It is true that you were abused.
You were hurt.
You were treated unfairly, right?
You were wronged and that is valid, right?
You don't have to deny that.
You don't have to pretend like that didn't
happen.
You can choose to forgive and that is
better for you.
And you can hope for, you can hope
for, you can also decide that you want
complete justice in the year after and that
is also fine, right?
And you are also sad at what you
have lost, right?
And that is also true.
So don't deny either of these, all right?
You can be sad and of course knowing
that, yes, he's your father, your blood, right?
Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A'la chosen
to be your father and there is that
human connection, of course.
So yes, you can be sad and if
you don't feel sad at the loss of
an abusive father, for example, that is also
fine.
You don't have to force yourself to be
sad because sadness is not a requirement, all
right?
It is not an obligation, especially if Allah
Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A'la has taken
away somebody who is causing so much pain,
right?
So at the end of the day, you
accept Allah's decree.
Allah decreed that you are tested through someone
who is so close to you, right?
This was written.
This is a test that Allah Subh'anaHu
Wa Ta-A'la had decreed for you
in Allah's perfect wisdom.
So accept it.
Accept Allah's decree, right?
You were patient over it.
You did what you could to protect yourself.
You are doing what you can to heal
and this is all part of patience.
SubhanAllah, that is a difficult question to tackle
with so much emotional intelligence.
The next question that I have submitted is
what can I do if Salah does not
give me peace?
If Salah does not give you peace, keep
praying.
Keep praying Salah because if Allah has said
وَاسْتَعِينُوا بِالصَّبْرِ وَالصَّلَىٰ that means that we need
both of them, right?
وَاسْتَعِينُوا بِالصَّبْرِ Seek help through patience.
Patience is not something that is intuitive in
everybody.
Sometimes you have to learn, right?
And part of patience is that you learn
ways to control yourself and you learn ways
to heal.
And perhaps that means going to a therapist.
Perhaps that means taking a class like this
to help you recognize, understand what's happening to
you so that you can find peace, Inshallah.
But Sabr is not the only thing that
you do, right?
Allah has told us وَاسْتَعِينُوا بِالصَّبْرِ وَالصَّلَىٰ So
do both.
Do both.
Do what is needed to bring you the
peace that you need and try different things.
Could be physical exercise.
Could be going out in the nature.
Could be talking to a mental health professional
who can help you.
But don't say that Salah is not bringing
me peace.
It will.
It definitely will.
So you need both, Inshallah.
Beautiful.
The next question that I have is I
have a son that's newly diagnosed with autism.
It seems like such a long journey and
so many unknowns on the journey.
Sometimes I struggle with how to ask Allah
for help.
I do make du'a.
Do you have any other suggestions?
Being tested through your children, their health, is
definitely a huge trial.
It can be extremely difficult.
But what I would and I'm speaking as
a parent and every parent is tested in
different ways.
What I would say is thank Allah for
what he has blessed you with.
Your child has been diagnosed with this condition
but this is not the only thing that
your child has.
Your child has a lot of beautiful things.
Your child is much more than their diagnosis.
So don't forget to appreciate and enjoy the
blessings that Allah has given you through this
beautiful child of yours.
Don't just view them as a test or
something that is so difficult now.
But there's also so many good things about
your child.
So thank and praise Allah for those things.
And another thing I would say is don't
live your life in fear that this might
happen, that might happen, people are going to
bully my child, he's not going to have
any friends, he's going to struggle in school,
how is he ever going to find work,
etc.
Don't live your life in fear.
Allah is the one who created you, your
child.
Allah is Ar-Razzaq.
So every struggle that you come across, just
dua is your weapon.
Dua is your weapon.
Just keep calling upon Allah.
Keep praying to Allah to guide you, to
help you, to provide for you the best
people, the best tools, means you need to
help your child.
And remember this, this life is a journey
back to Allah.
Inshallah.
MashaAllah, everyone's coming from such a diverse set
of experiences and struggles and you realize how
it manifests in so many people's lives, subhanAllah.
I'm so glad that we have this course
as a resource for you all and I
hope that everyone who is listening, especially the
reason why we made it pay what you
can is so that there would be no
barrier to anyone being able to benefit.
So make sure you do check out albaqr
.online for the rest of the grounded experience
to continue to benefit on this journey.
The next question that I have is when
thoughts of distress become too much, I have
a tendency to Google or talk to people
to primarily seek reassurance.
It can be very toxic.
How can I practically pivot towards the divine
in those tough moments?
So it's okay to Google and find out
what's happening to you, right?
It's something very normal and it's also perfectly
fine to talk to people.
But of course, too much of anything can
be unhealthy and especially if you're not talking
to the right people, then of course such
conversations will not be beneficial then.
They can actually be very harmful.
So what you can do is allow yourself
space to talk to people so that you
can get good advice, right?
Read about it so that you can understand
what is happening but also make yourself focus
on doing things that will help you in
the situation that you are in, right?
So for example, in the Quran, Allah tells
his messenger that وَسَبِّحْ بِحَمْدِ رَبِّكَ How you
deal with this pain and agony is that
you glorify and praise Allah.
So also set a goal for yourself that,
for example, سُبْحَانَ اللَّهِ وَبِحَمْدِهِ سُبْحَانَ اللَّهِ العَظِيمِ
I'm going to say it a hundred times.
Right?
And especially when thoughts are worrying you, when
certain feelings are overwhelming you at that time
especially set a goal for yourself that I'm
going to sit and I'm going to do
dhikr.
سُبْحَانَ اللَّهِ وَبِحَمْدِهِ a hundred times.
سُبْحَانَ اللَّهِ وَالْحَمْدُ لِلَّهِ وَلَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا اللَّهُ
وَاللَّهُ أَكْبَرُ a hundred times.
لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا اللَّهُ وَحْدَهُ لَا شَرِيكَ لَهُ
الْمُلْكُ وَلَهُ الْحَمْدُ وَهُوَ عَلَى كُلِّ شَيْءٍ قَدِيرٍ
a hundred times.
Because a person who says this a hundred
times then Shaytan cannot harm that person.
And a lot of times such negative thoughts
that become unmanageable, they are they can be
from Shaytan to hurt us, to keep us
worried, to keep us distracted.
So fight away those thoughts by the dhikr
of Allah, Inshallah.
Beautiful.
I know we're getting close to the hour
so I'm going to try to take maybe
one or two more questions, Inshallah.
And Jazakumullahu khair.
The questions have been phenomenal so far, Inshallah.
Thank you for putting yourselves out there and
sharing your own pain so that others can
benefit as well.
The next question that I have is, Allah
Subhana Ta'ala tells us that He does
not test us beyond what we can bear.
I'm wondering if I understand this ayah correctly
because we see people quite literally die under
the tests Allah Subhana Ta'ala gave them.
What are we supposed to understand from this
ayah?
So there are two interpretations of this ayah.
One interpretation is لا يكلف الله نفسا إلا
وسعها This is talking about religious obligations.
Only.
That Allah will never obligate us with a
religious task that is beyond our capacity.
Never.
So for example, if a person is unable
to stand up, right, because of the fever
that they have, because of their physical condition,
well, Allah will not require from them that
they stand up and pray.
No, because Allah does not burden a soul
beyond their capacity which is why this person
can sit down and pray.
This person can make tayammum instead of wudu'
to pray.
This person can lie down and pray.
Right?
So some ulama say that this ayah is
strictly talking about religious obligations.
And other ulama say that this ayah is
also talking about worldly trials.
And what that means is that Allah Subhana
Ta'ala will not burden you with a
trial that you cannot bear.
Okay?
Which means that you can bear it with
your faith in Allah Subhana Ta'ala.
And you can bear it with the tools
or with the means that Allah Subhana Ta
'ala provides for you, the yusr, the ease
that Allah Subhana Ta'ala provides for you
in that hardship.
And this does not mean that you're not
going to die.
Because every soul is going to die.
And yes, people are going to die.
For example, somebody is shocked by something extremely
painful that has happened, which causes them to
have a heart attack, which causes them to
die.
Well, you're not going to bring this ayah
over here and say that, oh brother, you
should be patient and you should not have
the heart attack and you should not die
because of this.
No.
Every person is going to die.
Alright?
So this ayah does not mean that Allah
will not give a hardship that is not
going to eventually kill a person.
Because people will die eventually.
And of course we die because our body
is not able to bear the disease or
the physical condition that our body is exposed
to.
And this is why people die.
Alright?
So this ayah does not mean that Allah
will not give you trials that will not
lead to your death.
No.
Physical trials will lead to death eventually.
But that mentally and in your faith you
will find means to have the strength to
be pleased with Allah and to be patient
with His decree no matter what that decree
is.
Alright?
Jazakumullahu khair, Usada.
Thank you for all your thorough, thorough responses
to the various questions that we've had coming
in.
I know there's many more that are pending
but as we mentioned InshaAllah we'll have opportunities
to continue asking them.
Genuinely I can tell from the messages coming
in from the chat and the warm reception
here that so many people have benefited, Mila,
except from us and from you, Usada.
Any final reminders before we close off for
today?
I was just going to say that a
lot of these questions InshaAllah I hope will
get resolved automatically once you enroll in this
course 100%.
Because a lot of times the confusions that
we have or the doubts that we have
or the things that are just not clear
to us in our lives.
Why is this happening?
And sometimes it's because of our incomplete understanding
of religious texts, right?
So for example we think that all patience
just means just bear everything and don't do
anything about it.
But InshaAllah through this course InshaAllah you'll understand
what it means to be patient and how
do you practice sabr and how do you
help yourself in such times of trial.
Beautiful.
JazakAllah Usada.
It's been a pleasure to have you on
as our launching guest for our bonus webinar
series for Grounded Online.
We look forward to continuing to benefit from
you in all aspects of the Maghreb community
and the Maghreb worldwide student body Alhamdulillah and
we look forward to seeing you very soon
InshaAllah Take care.
Assalamualaikum Waalaikumussalam That was Usada Taimiyah Zuber for
our first iteration of our bonus webinar series.
JazakAllah khair to all of you for your
attendance and a really warm welcome to all
of you who've already attended and who've already
registered for the Grounded Online experience InshaAllah I
do want to remind you guys if you
have questions that didn't get a chance to
be answered, as Usada mentioned, this course, the
reason why we have 18 plus hours of
content, that we have live Q&As with
Usada Sarasultan, that we put a whole seminar
just on Muslim mental health and navigating the
struggles and the challenges that everyday Muslims experience
is so that we can properly address them
and thoroughly, thoroughly give you guys the resources
and the responses and the tools that you
need to be able to navigate this in
whatever situation that you've experienced in the past,
what you're experiencing now and whatever may come
up in the future, wherever you're coming in
from, whatever walk of life, whatever challenge, whatever
background, whatever history whatever culture that you're coming
in from so I highly recommend you guys
check out magrib.online and InshaAllah register again,
we made the course pay what you can
so there's no barrier to anybody from any
corner of the world to be able to
enter and to benefit and for those who
can contribute just a little bit more your
support is going to help us to continue
making classes like this and to extend the
support to others who need it most InshaAllah
so once again, grounded online, check it out,
register, don't hesitate the course is available as
soon as you sign up, you get access
to all the content and a lot of
the questions that many of you have asked
here already, I recall seeing the answers discussed
in detail in the course content itself InshaAllah
and once again, the next session that we
have is InshaAllah actually going to be tomorrow
so tomorrow we're going to be here back
at 6pm EST so a slightly different time
and it's going to be with Dr. Zohair
Abdulrahman on overcoming depression through faith and I
saw a lot of questions on depression so
for those of you who are here, who
are looking for those answers please make sure
that you do join us InshaAllah 6pm tomorrow
and we'll see you then live.
In the meantime, please share the khair with
others we hope that you benefit, please keep
among your bani and our instructors near to
us and we'll see you guys very soon,
take care